Acknowledging Need or Lack

I have seen a few facebook statuses recently that have asserted the idea that God has provided for all our needs and we should not focus on what we lack but should believe that we are complete, whole, fulfilled and blessed in Christ etc.

Ephesians 1:3 says we have “Every spiritual blessing in Christ.” It does not say “Every physical blessing.” It goes on to list these blessings as forgiveness, reconciliation, holiness, blamelessness, sonship etc. These are wonderful spiritual blessings. There are other verses that talk about God providing for needs and blessing us, but, in my opinion, the Bible does not guarantee all our needs will be met in this lifetime on this earth.

There are orphans starving to death and their need for food has been left unmet. I’m forgiven for all my sin and it does not affect my relationship with God, but it still affects my relationships with other human beings. People sell children as sex slaves, wage war and put on self-protective facades to avoid intimacy, because this world is in lack and the need for love is often not being met. 

I’m going to be embarrassingly honest and admit that my greatest area of lack … is sex. I’m not married and I generally don’t have sex. I’m waiting for love. 

Being raised as a Christian, I was taught that “God is all I need.” I struggled with this idea because I experienced needs like affection and attention that I believed I lacked greatly at times and less so at other times. 

Now I hear arguments that God has provided for all needs and again I feel frustrated because my experience says otherwise. When discussing whether or not my experience lines up with God’s word teaching that I am forgiven and don’t need to feel condemned (Romans 8:1) I totally agree. But the word of God does not guarantee that I will ever get married or that all of my physical, emotional and sexual needs will be met.

In the past I have tried to alter my perspective and convince myself that I don’t need what I need. I have learned to be more content in my singleness and much more accepting of myself as a person. However, what I am learning now is that I have to embrace and validate my own needs despite anyone’s opinion that I have no lack or no need in Christ. I disagree with this and I own the fact that I want a partner in life. I want more hugs, more massages; quality time with a man who can hardly keep his eyes off me, deep discussions and someone to live with long term. I accept my need and I will no longer apologise for it :)

If you would be interested in reading more about my struggles in singleness and sexuality, let me know and I will write more on this topic in the future.